47 METERS DOWN (2017)

TAGLINE: NO HELP ABOVE, NO HOPE BELOW.

Let me preface this entire post by saying that I kind of have a fear of the ocean. I definitely have a major phobia when it comes to humpback whales but I have a good bit of fear in terms of the ocean. I can sense the usual judgment! It’s just too vast for my taste. There’s too much going on down there that can’t be seen and I do not dig it. I will go to the beach and step in about shin deep, but, never will I ever go scuba diving. Not happening.

Having said that, if you can relate, this movie will freak you out. I literally had chills when that cage started to drop. ALL THE CHILLS. You go into this movie thinking that it’s a typical movie where vacationers try to roll with the locals and things go awry. Well, it is, but magnified by a hundred. It is absolutely terrifying just for the fact that it’s something that could happen in real life. I literally have chills just thinking about it all over again.

As per usual there were some “ponder points” of commentary:

  • Matthew Modine playing the part of the old(er) American boat captain. Surprising! Where in the world has he been for umpteen years?
  • Claire Holt’s American accent is fantastic. Superb work on that. I kept trying to hear any kind of slip or hint of her Australian accent, but, heard nothing.
  • Number one rule of any vacation: Don’t do any activity that is suggested by random locals! Tale as old as time. Red flag to end all red flags. If the activity is not in the hotel/resort brochure, it’s a no go!
  • Never have I ever been excited to see a shark. I can safely predict that this would certainly not change if the shark was up close and personal. I don’t care if I was in a steel cage or not, I’m not taking selfies with Jaws in the background.
  • Why is there always that one weirdo who has to be a douchebag? Seriously. One of the boat crew members, Javier or whatever his name was… such a jerk for no reason. He reminded me of Mateo on Anaconda. Just shut your face and grab the oxygen tanks or whatever you’re supposed to do, dude. We don’t need you out here trying to psych people out or sound like you’re the oceanic Crypt Keeper.
  • Why did Kate’s wet suit have to be all up her butt? What is that protecting? We don’t need sex appeal in this situation. We need full coverage and a bottle of Batman’s shark repellent spray.
  • How was the boat even legit to be on the water? Super rickety and unsafe obviously. Inspection needed ASAP! Although I’m sure he would have to be out of business at the end of the day.

All in all? I thought it was fantastic! Two thumbs up, 3.5 out of 5 stars, or whatever kind of rating you so choose to use.

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